your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize