It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
