is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
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