everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
