And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
birth control should be required to get into college
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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