Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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