batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
