Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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