i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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