I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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