Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Randomize
