She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize