Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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