i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
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