You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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