sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
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