Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
