I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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