ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
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