sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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