I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
