Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Randomize
