one word: firstdatebathroomanal
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
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