bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
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