I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
home. puking in laundry basket.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
