i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
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