you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
