iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Randomize