i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
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