I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I will be naked everywhere
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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