Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Randomize
