The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Randomize
