I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Dicks are not precious.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Randomize