god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Randomize
