I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
