bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Randomize
