did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
