The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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