I hate all girls vehemently.
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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