C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize