Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
