Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
