She went from zero to smokin in five shots
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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