I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
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