C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Found your dick twin last night
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
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