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My pussy is not your playground.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
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