hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
