I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize