My sheets look like a crime scene.
There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Randomize
