in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
